2007 Latin Billboard Awards

Reggaetón had a pretty slow year, and it showed at the 2007 Billboard Latin Music Awards, held April 26th at the BankUnited Center in Miami, with the main prizes going to Mexican acts. Among the big winners were pop group RBD (they snagged three awards: Top Latin Album Artist of the Year, Latin Pop Album of the Year by a Group or Duo, and Latin Tour of the Year) and regional Mexican singer Mariano Barba (who won 4 awards: Hot Latin Song of the Year for "Aliado del Tiempo," Regional Mexican Album of the Year (New Artist), Regional Mexican Airplay Song (New Artist), and Regional Mexican Airplay Song of the Year (Male Solo Artist)).

BUT, here are the awards that are pertinent to reggaetón:

Hot Latin Songs Artist of the Year: Wisin y Yandel (for "Rakata" of all songs -- that joint came out maaad long ago, but hey...)

Reggaeton Album of the Year: "King of Kings" by Don Omar (sorry, but this was a lackluster album... who made this call?!)

Latin Ringtone of the Year: "Rakata" (okay, that WAS one veryone's doggone phone!)

Reggaeton Song of the Year:"'Down" by Rakim y Ken-Y (FINALLY!!! An award that was very, very merited)

Producer of the Year: Luny Tunes (Yeah, these cats made some hits... This is their second year in a row winning in this category, so kudos to them)

Latin Rhythms Albums Label of the Year: Machete (I don't even understand why this award exists... The Grammys don't have a "best label" category!!! And Machete pretty much has the market in a chokehold, so that's neither here nor there)

Latin Rhythm Airplay Label of the Year: Machete (see above comments!)

Latin Rap/Hip-Hop Album of the Year: "Toby Love" by Toby Love (Uhmmmm, since when is bachata hip-hop? WTF?)

So yes, an unexciting award ceremony, but there ypu have it folks...

Calle 13 Album Review

As a disclaimer, I've been very clear about my fervent dislike for Calle 13. Soooo, although I tried to be unbiased in my review, it was difficult to get past the fact that these cats just nauseate me. That beign said, I heard the Residente o Visitante album and hoped that maybe, just maybe, I would find some redeeming qualities in it -- be it great production or lyrical proficiency. Nope. Not at all. In fact, I'm left to wonder if all those people raving about these guys actually took the time to listen to the alum.

Residente makes a deliberate effort to be vulgar and offensive on every track -- now mind you, I'm hardly a puritan, but vulgar references aren't even enjoyable when they're so clearly made to provoke a sense of shock. There's no artistry here -- just a string of moronic verses that seek to cause discomfort and spark controversy (and I'm not easily shocked, so whatever). Sadly, the whole gimmick has worked -- journos describe Residente as being defiant or being undeterred by standards of decency. Truth be told, it's not that Residente says what's on his mind -- that would make him a GOOD artist; it's the opposite -- the isht is forced and therefore, completely inauthentic. Need examples? Let's break it down with some actual tracks:

"La Fuckin Moda"
-- Let's just pick out this verse: "Tienes los tenis embarraos de caca/Te paraste en un mojón color de espinaca." Loosely translated, it means "Your sneakers are covered in shit/You steppened on a turd the color of spinach." THIS is supposed to be revolutionary? Come on, now!
-- And, of course, there's the oh-so-clever hook "Quien es este cabrón infeliz?" Uhmmm..Riiiiiiight.

"Malasuerte Con El 13"
-- In an R.Kelly-ish turn, Calle 13 asks a girl to pee on him ("Oriname en el pecho") and goes on to talk about how, when he has sex, he climaxes in no time ("Cuando lo hundo hasta lo más profundo/ me vengo rápido"). Sure, he's supposed to be self-deprecating, but the obscanity-laden track really isn't funny or catchy in the slightest. Just retarded.

"Algo Con Sentido"
-- On this one, he steers clear of his usual focus on genitalia and goes on and on about how he's crazy and no one understandas him. I think this is his wannabe Eminem circa the Slim Shady LP years because he talks about wanting to chop heads off with barbed wire, wanting to kindap naked people and rip off their genitals, etc. ("Presiento que va a haber mucha sangre/vamos a cortar cabezas con alambres de búa/Vamos a secuestrar gentes desnudas y cortarle las tetas, los pipis y las totas"). Seriously, given how F'd up the world is right now (from the Virginia Tech massacre to the constant crimes of passion taking place), it's hardly the time to release a song that celebrates psychosis and violence for violence's sake.

A'ight, so now that you've actually read some of the lyrics, can I get an Amen?

Zion Performing at GIANT showcase

Zion was one of the featured artists at GIANT magazine's second artist showcase, held Tuesday April 10 in NYC, along with labelmates Mya and Swizz Beatz. I've included some pics from his performance for your viewing pleasure (or horror if you're not a fan).

I can't comment on the performance itself because sadly, I wasn't there (sniffle, sniffle), but I've gotten mixed reviews. The one thing everyone agreed on was the fact that he was pretty stiff --didn't have back-up dancers, didn't dance himself, and just basiclly stood in place and sang. I was a bit surprised to hear that 'cause, when he was with Lennox, they used to do funny stuff like pretend to smack some booty and dumb ish like that, or they'd have kick-ass dancers and let them do all the dazzling stage moves. But maybe it was a budgeting issue (most likely, they would have had to fly girls from PR) or maybe he wants to steer clear of that... Really ain't no telling...

A couple things pop out just from looking at the pics though -- mainly, why is he wearing a velvet blazer and a button-down? He always used to rock T-shirts with cool graphics and flossy dunks, and now he's looking real cabaret-ish. Maybe he's trying to eke out a different style and get his grown & sexy on but frankly, a velvet blazer is just a Barry Manilow move (not to mention that the jacket and the shirt don't really match). And that Luis Miguel haircut is kinda wack too. It's a shame 'cause Zion always was a cutie (I think he gained some weight too because his face looks fuller). Honestly, somebody needs to dial up a stylist because this rico suave look is a no-no. But hey, dude can def. sing so let's just hope he gets steered in the right direction as far as management, promotion, etc.

Daddy Yankee's Radio Show And Tour News

According to the latest numbers released by Arbitron, "Daddy Yankee On Fuego," broadcast on ABC Radio Networks, is the highest-rated radio program among Latinos ages 12-34 within such key markets as New York, Los Angeles, Houston, Phoenix, Miami, and Sacramento — essentially, urban hubs with large Latino populations. WKSQ in New York City saw its ratings rise 184% among listeners ages 12-24. I've never quite understood how they can accurately determine these demographic-specific factoids but, hey, I'm just telling y'all like they told me.

In more DY-related news, his album El Cartel: The Big Boss will be released June 5th on Interscope Records. According to Billboard.com, DY is planning a 40-city arena tour of U.S. and Latin America which will kick off Aug. 31 at the Allstate Arena in Chicago. The U.S. part of the tour spans 18 cities, with the last performance being held at Houston's Toyota Center. Miguelito, DY's 8-year-old protege, has signed on as the opening act. Oh, and the tour is called Da Bigg Boss (why they're choosing to spell the title in this retardedly ghetto-ass way is beyond me). In any case, here are the dates that have been revealed (more will be announced at the Billboard Latin Music Conference/Awards April 23-26 in Miami):

Aug. 31: Chicago, IL (Allstate Arena)
Sept. 2: Boston, MA (Agganis Arena at Boston Univ.)
Sept. 7: New York City (Madison Square Garden)
Sept. 8: Washington, DC (Patriot Center)
Sept. 9: Uncasville, Connecticut (Mohega Sun Arena)
Sept. 14: Miami, FL (American Airlines Arena)
Sept. 15: Orlando, FL (TD Watehouse)
Sept. 21: Hidalgo, TX (Dodge Arena)
Sept. 22: Laredo, TX (Laredo Ent. Center)
Sept. 23: San Antonio, TX (AT&T Center)
Sept. 29: Las Vegas, NV (Mandalay Bay Events Center)
Sept. 30: Fresno, CA (Save Mart Center)
Oct. 5: San Francisco, CA (Cow Palace -- I'm still waiting for someone to write me and tell me there's no such place! I mean "COW Palace"? lol)
Oct. 6-7: Los Angeles, CA (Gibson Amphiteatre)
Oct. 13: Dallas, TX (American Airlines Arena)
Oct. 14: Houston, TX (Toyota Center)

This will be Yankee's second arena tour (in 2005, he traveled the US and Latin America with his "Who's Your Daddy?" tour). To date, he's the only reggaetón artist who has been able to headline an arena tour stateside BY HIMSELF (multiple acts on one bill are quite common, of course) and successfully move tickets, but time will tell whether he'll be as successful this time around....

Don Omar Teams Up with Egyptian Singer

Don Omar is currently in Egypt where, last Saturday, April, 14th, he filmed the video for a new song called "Tuigui" (don't ask me what that means!) with "famed" Egyptian singer Hakim (en su casa lo conocen, but whatever). According to sources, the track was produced by Eliel, and it's basically a message of racial solidarity — it's definitely a commendable move, but I can't help but wonder why he's collaborating with an Egyptian artist... I mean, Egypt isn't in the midst of a bloody war -- it's not like he's teaming up with a Palestinian, Iraqi, or Israeli artist, so it seems a little weird but hey... Apparently, the track is set to be included in Hakim's upcomign album, Lion of Egypt, set for a fall release.

He also had a press conference in Egypt before over 100 journalists.Who knew reggaetón was big in Egypt? Go figure.

Oh, and as a side note, Don Omar is now the first reggaetón artist to travel to Egypt for a performance. Doesn't it just kill you how every reggaetón artist wants to be the first to do something? Next thing you know, there will be someone else going to Egypt claiming that, though Omar went there first, HE was the first to perform in X,Y, or Z city, to have a professional photo shoot there, or to pick his nose by the pyramids. Whatever. Keep making moves, y'all, but please don't try to turn random isht into historical moments.

These Dodo Birds Are Back At It

So Calle 13 is about to be on the cover of damn near every major Latino publication in the US. Shiiiit, they're lucky I don't own a mag because they'd be on my cover alright -- with like little horns and mustaches drawn on them (a la grade school). Here's a peak at some of the covers (and excerpts of the accompanying babble/dribble in the articles). One writer actually compared them to the Beastie Boys -- riiiiiiighhhhhhhht, dude! Try again! For humorous purposes, my comments are inserted in caps (yes, i know I'm being evil).


"Calle 13 comes out blasting in a fiery new CD…the long-awaited second CD is a love letter to Latin America [PLEASE! DIDN'T THEY JUST START TRAVELING T0 LATIN AMERICA? SOMEBODY ASK RENE WHERE URUGUAY IS, PLEASE!! SUCH AN OBVIOUS PLOY TO GET SALES ELSEWHERE]… an exhilarating travelogue [TRAVELOGUE? NOW YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO SOUND CLEVER, WRITER MAN] through the sounds and rhythms of ‘El Sur’ with generous sprinklings of Calle 13’s foul-mouthed [NOW, WHY IS IT THAT IT'S OKAY FOR THEM TO BE FOUL-MOUTHED BUT NOT BABY RASTA, TEMPO, OR WHOMEVER ELSE? SOUNDS LIKE CLASSISM TO ME!] lyrical brilliance [ OH YEAH, BECAUSE THAT WHOLE METAPHOR ABOUT THE BALD HEAD AND THE VOLCANIC FLOW ON VOLTIO'S "CULIN CHULIN CHU FLY" WAS JUST BRILLIANT!]… ‘Residente o Visitante’ flows like a muddy river [OR A SWAMP] of pounding-beats, acoustic instruments and sick humor… this is the new Calle 13: bold and controversial as ever, and absolutely ready to take a stand [ON WHAT?]”
– New York Daily News – “Viva” – April COVER Story

“Calle 13 Leads Us Into Temptation…their outrageously clever style has placed them on the throne of the urban genre [PLEASE, THEY'RE NOT EVEN CROWN POLISHERS YET!]… Whether it’s rap, reggaeton or tropical-alternative-urban, the team of stepbrothers known as René Pérez, “Residente” and Eduardo Cabra, “Visitante,” bring their flow to a whole new level by unveiling a superior [SUPERIOR TO WHAT? YODELING?] form of music with the release of their second album, Residente o Visitante…Calle 13 is the new force showing its impact by putting dem bow [MAN, THESE CATS ARE NOT REAL REGGAETON ARTISTS -- AND CAN WRITERS STOP REFERRING TO THE DEMBOW IF THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS?! LOL] to the test. They have redefined quality by raising the bar through their projection of powerful lyrics and original musical proposals [WHAT DID THEY PROPOSE? IDIOCY?] in what we now know as the alternative urban sound…[Calle 13 is] the new generation of outspoken musical revolutionaries [PLEASE, THEY'RE LIKE EL CHAPULIN COLORADO AND EL CHAVO DEL OCHO]… Residente and Visitante operate on a level that ignores classification, limitations and exclusion [AS WELL AS ARTISTRY, INTELLIGENCE, AND SELF-RESPECT].”
– Batanga – May COVER story

“Calle 13 stretch Reggaeton to fit their ambitions… with their second CD, they’re determined to build on their already impressive debut and re-sculpt Reggaeton… In a way, they’re comparable to the Beastie boys… expanding their sound far beyond [a genre’s] previously imagined limits… [they reject] Reggaeton cliché”
- Global Rhythm – May COVER Story

“The duo who have stretched the limits of reggaeton are poised to clarify their identity with the release of their second album… Calle 13’s emergence on the music scene has been sudden and explosive… the group went from underground to Grammy winners at a blinding clip… [Calle 13 are] a rhythmically hypnotic and impishly [HOW ABOUT WE JUST SAY THEY'RE IMPS?] whimsical attack on egos and pretensions [IRONICALLY, RENE'S EGO IS THROUGH THE ROOF!].” – HISPANIC Magazine- April Cover Tag Feature

“Ready To Blow-Up in 2007…Calle 13's avant-garde [TRANSLATION: THE WRITER DIDN'T HEAR THE ALBUM AND THEREFORE RESORTED TO A BIG WORD] debut proved that the genre can have a sense of purpose [AND WHAT EXACTLY WOULD THAT BE?] and the duo continues to push the envelope in '07 with their reggaetón-tango mash-up aptly titled “Tango Del Pecado.”… It's hard to imagine Calle 13 eclipsing their '06 accomplishments [MAN, LISTEN, THEIR ONLY ACCOMPLISHMENT WAS WINNING AWARDS THEY DIDN'T DESERVE BECAUSE THEY WERE FAVORED BY AN ACADEMY MADE OF OLD FOGGIES], but after shocking the world [THEY SHOCKED THE WORLD BECAUSE THEY WERE UNDESERVING, Y'ALL!] …look for the boys from Trujillo Alto, Puerto Rico, to raise their game to a whole new level [UHMMM, THAT'S NOT THAT HARD... THE BAR WAS SET KINDA LOW...].” – New York Post

“Calle 13 is back with a new CD…and if the album is anything like it's first single, it will be a bomb [A BOMB MEANING IT'LL TANK?]. "Tango del Pecado" is the best reggaeton I've heard [AND WHAT HAVE YOU HEARD, YOUNG'UN? IT'S FIRST QUARTER -- BE EASY!] so far in 2007. Residente and Visitante reinvent the genre all over again, as they did on Calle 13's self-titled debut album last year…[Residente’s] lyrical flow is unmatched [WHAAAAAAT? I'LL JUST SPIT OUT NAMES: YANKEE, TEGO, HECTOR EL FATHER, TEMPO, IVY QUEEN, EDDI DEE, DON OMAR, ARCANGEL, WISIN.... LOOK 'EM UP, HOMES], his satirical style a relief in a genre that's taking itself way too serious [OH, SO NOW WE NEED A MINSTREL ACT BECAUSE THE GENRE IS TAKING ITSELF TOO SERIOUS?!! NOT EXACTLY THE SOLUTION]. As with their breakthrough single "Atrévete-te", you can also interpret the song as an answer to common prejudices surrounding reggaeton and hip-hop.”
- La Onda Tropical

Daddy Yankee featured in April/May issue of GIANT

Yes, this is an instance of shameless self-promotion on my part but hey, if I don't do it, who will? lol Anyway, I wrote a hefty story on Daddy Yankee for this month's issue of GIANT magazine (the dopest urban entertainment publication out there, ya heard?!)

Check it out -- Eve's on the cover of the issue, and I won't give away too many surprises as to what Yankee says, BUT here are a few highlights...


On his silence about past doings:

"Most artists from my generation survived off of hustling. In the midst of poverty, I did what I had to do..."



On recent articles proclaiming the death of reggaetón:

"The people who say reggaetón died need to do their research. How can reggaetón be dead if the top-selling album of 2006 was my album [Barrio Fino en Directo]?"



On the song "Me Quedaría," off of this summer's El Cartel?

"It's a really crude track about the reasons why so many Latinos immigrate to the U.S. People don't understand they why behind the Latino [immigration flow], and I felt like as a Latino and a songwriter, I had to speak on it."


Want more? Go out and buy the issue, biiiiaaaatcheees!!!!